Imaginary Beings; three characters walk into a Bar.

Three characters walk into a bar, a Virus, a Human and Santa Claus. The bartender refuses to serve the Human and Santa Claus on the basis that he regards them as chimera, but happily serves the Virus with three beakers of industrial alcohol, which the Virus generously shares with his two colleagues.


As the bar is otherwise empty, the bartender joins them at a table, where a lively discussion ensues in the form of a classical exposition and argumentative discourse designed to test the identity, integrity and sovereignty of each drinker.


This hypothetical scenario seeks to analyse the biological identity and historical constructions that define life, and to trace the genetic exchanges, leakages and seepages that take place between radically divergent species, in particular, the incorporation of exogenous genetic material delivered by a virus —the Virus being confident that at least 8% of the Human he sits next to is composed of the DNA of ancient retroviruses that have infected the germ cells (eggs and sperm) of the Human species over the course of millions
of years.


The scientist might well ask the Virus if it is a living or non-living being since it cannot reproduce independently, only within the cell of a living entity. In the same manner, the Virus might also turn his attention to the jolly and extremely palpable figure of Santa Claus and ask the same question. Santa Claus would have to respond that despite the many historical claims to his authentic identity, his existence is only reproduced in the minds of young humans propelled with the assistance of entities such as the Coca-Cola Corporation of America.


In his defence, Santa might propose that despite this, he is just as real, in fact even more real, than the Virus, in consideration of the profound effect that he has on human behaviour, belief systems and relationships—after all, he can cite the fact that more people believe in him than the reality of the SARS-CoV-2 virus.


In a nutshell, the play intertwines biological and genetic ’realities’ with constructs of the human imaginary, in an attempt to tease out the ever blurry outlines of existence identity, and belief systems.

Read the one-act play here.

Click the hotlink to the left to read online; Click download to, well…download :).